What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

How did the dragon get AIDS? He had sex with an HIV positive dragon months prior.

How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

Why is six scared of seven? Because seven is in his house with an axe.

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a whore.

There is a car full of black people.

Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

charlie sheen losing

What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow wh- MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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