How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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I have no ideas.

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whats black and white and red all over? this joke.

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What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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Why was the mexican ugly? -UR MOM!

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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What do you call a room full of Jews? A gas chamber.

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What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

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Why did the little girl drop her teddy bear? Because she was being sexually molested. Why did the little Jewish girl drop her teddy bear? Because gas came out of the shower-head.

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What did the Homeless man get for Christmas? A dollar

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

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A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

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Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

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What rhymes with ten? Rape..... What rhymes with boat? Float.....

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

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Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Your doorbell is broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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