What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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What's the worst thing to find in an empty box? Nothing,It's empty

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Peoples' bad attempts at Anti-Jokes.

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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My trip to Italia: Italian most: WELCOME TO ITAAAAAAALIA! YOU WANT THE PIZZA YES? Me asking my then Italian girlfriend: Are all Italians so loud? Then girlfriend: Yeah kinda... Her brother overhearing us: WHO! GAVE! YOU THE BALLS! TO JUDGE US! Me: Uh I am just surprised at... Her bro: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS... DONT LOOK AT ME! Me: *looking down at the ground somewhat ashamed* bro: LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! NO! DONT LOOK AT ME! I will let you go for this time yes? Next time I will take you outside and beat you up okay? LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! AND DO NOT LOOK AT ME! Conclusion: Wow you Italians are bad ass... I mean hell this is was a real life experience of mine, I was just a teen back then but I got a headache and threw up ending up in bed later... Fact: I am nearly two meters but walk with a hunch, the guy was half my size but still broke me down, wow Italians are bad ass...

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Do you know what's sad about 4 black men driving off a cliff in a convertible? They were my friends.

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What did the gay guy say to the other gay guy Want to make out?

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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Chuck Norris

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

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A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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Pikachu says "Pikachu!" Squirtle says "Squirtle!" Charmander says "Charmander!" Ash is upset because he cannot communicate with his Pokemon in their foreign tongue.

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What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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