josh roberts got the d in geog

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What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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Mum: Black or white iPod? Her Son: Black Please, it'll run faster.

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What is worse than torture? Not much.

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Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

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Roses are Red Violets are plucked So are my nose-hairs Pretty disgusting

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a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

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3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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The awkward moment when you have cancer.

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A man walks into a bar and see's a 12 inch pianoist. He walks to the bar tendar and asks "Where'd you get it" The bar tendar says we have a genie in the back. So the man walks back the and wishes for 12 million BUCKS , The genie gives him 12 million DUCKS, The man walks back out and said " I asked for 12 million BUCKS not 12 million DUCKS and the bar tendar says do you really think i asked for a 12 inch pianoist?

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Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

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Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

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What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

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Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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