Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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I <3 Hitler

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

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what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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A black man, an arabic man, and a hispanic man are all in a car, who is driving? The black man.

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What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

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Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A horse walks into a bar. He called him Arthur. Those are two sentences.

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Roses are red, yup.

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Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

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yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

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Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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