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What rhymes with orange? Somalia.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

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Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

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How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

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Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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Why were The Beatles so popular? People across the world enjoyed their music.

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--IT'S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!! --no it isn't. a clock only has numbers 1-12 for hours and 1-60 for minutes. "peanut butter jelly" is not in any of those number sets. what are you taking about?

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A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. One polar says to the other, "Pass the soap please." And the other polar bear says, "No soap, radio!"

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Why did Johnny throw his money on the floor? Because he was giving it to charity

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would depend on whether it wanted to or not. If it did want to, it could potentially chuck an infinite amount of wood in its lifetime

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

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What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? ........

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops