How did the blind man eat his soup? With a spoon. Despite no vision, the man could feel the shape of what he was touching.

Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

What's the difference between a Watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? Nothing, two different species cannot propagate and gene splicing isn't advanced enough to separate the specific traits of an organism.

Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? None. While they were figuring out who to change the bulb the bulb lit a spark and the house caught fire. Everyone but one died. The black guy couldn't change the bulb because the bulb was lost in the fire.

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

Women's rights.

What's the deal with airline food? Nothin. It's quite scrumcious.

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

Why did the chicken cross the road? A man held him at gunpoint and threatened to kill his entire family.

A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

how did the man die he didnt

What did the little girls who's parents died in a car accident get for her birthday? Foster Parents

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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