What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

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Video Games

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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Q. Why did the man crash the car? A. Because the driver was a bling man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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who do we all like george goodburn

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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What's the differece between a rock and a black guy? A rock can't eat fried chicken.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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What's the main difference between an angry white man and an angry black man? The angry black man is probably of African descent.

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Why did the garbage man cross the road? He was doing his job.

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Man I just flew in from Pittsburgh...Boy are the people ugly.

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What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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what happens when you put nina and harry in the same room. Nina will die instantly of shock

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are numerous things worse than finding a worm in your apple. Some include the holocaust and nuclear warfare

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a person and one is an inanimate object

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My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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A man fuffers srom lysdexiea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops