Friend: Do you want to go to the bar or see a movie first? Me: Yes.

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

Why was the fat man removed from the restaurant? When his date didn't show up he started and crying and proceeded to stab himself with a fork

so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

A girl's opinion is respected.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? i know how to make a pizza

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

Is it possible to mix an answer to a question with another? No. Aids are perfect for fear training.

yo yo yo Niggaz Lol I really didn't have a joke but I REAAALLLLLYYY wants to gets #1 joke so PLEASE like this

Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

Robert Palmer: Doctor, Doctor! have you heard the news? Doctor: Yes.

Which is Taller ? the Giraffe or the Lion is faster ?

how many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 283,000,322,249,390

What do you tell a woman with two black guys? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partners and seek help.

justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

Why is this site so stupid? It's no, its the best site ever

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why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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