How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

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Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

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what did the right wing jew say after he was arrested for murder? bt we went through the holocust

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Pop Fiction last words. guess who edition: "Okay okay you win again Batman! Ahahaha hohohoho hehehehe! Wanna hear a new jo... Eh... what are you doing with that gun?" "Why did I not just take a step or two to the side during the five hours and over thirty episodes he kept charging that Kamehameha?" "Bah I cannot die as long as my ego is full! Are these really the ratings on my latest game? H0moerotic? Childish? A sociopath? Oh man..." Moral: Your red thumbs cannot hurt me! Im the moralmanBitch! HOAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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whats worse than forgetting your lunch at home? getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

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Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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How did the dinosaurs die???? How the Heck do I kno?

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When I walk in the rain, I get wet

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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Q.How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A.You don't. You kill her.

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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