Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? That feels quite good.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

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Hi

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

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I was going to write a racist joke but there was too many black people watching me.

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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Why did the dog lick his balls? Because he can.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

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Dear 6, Please stop spreading rumors about me. I heard you do some pretty nasty things with 9. Sincerely, 7

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A blind guy and a priest walk into a bar

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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A man walked into a bar...Ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall of the building and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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