what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

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What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

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Q: Why did the policeman stare at the big-breasted victim? A: She was dead.

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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why did one crayon give another crayon the silent treatment? because they are crayons, unable to speak

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

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What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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