Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

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What did the fly say to the frog? Nothing, insects can't talk.

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

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What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

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What's worse than Hitler killing six million Jews? All of the Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctior

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one who? Cares.

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like for a handjob.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

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How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Whats worse than finding an worm in your apple? 1942 BERLIN

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What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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Yeah right loser!

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Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

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what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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