There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

Dave: Heyy Steve! Steve: Oh heyy Dave! Dave: The word of the day is legs! Steve: so? Dave: So lets go back to your place and spread the word? Steve: ....How about right now? ;) Both: HEY EVERYONE..WE'RE GUNNA HAVE SEX!

When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

What does a jew to enter in a movie theater? He buys a ticket!

three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

How do you make a plummer sad? Kill his family.

what did the man say to his wife? I love you

Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

What did Timmy say when the bus crashed? Nothing, it was a horrible crash, he died like everyone else. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Timmy.

What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

How do you get a bear out of a tree with cheese? Camembert.

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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