what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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Steve jumps through a window...he forgot he was on the 231st floor...He dies

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they get married and live happy together for the rest of their lives.

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What do you call a blue colored dog with seven legs, that oinks? not a dog...

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a man walks into a bar and quickly notices a young lady having a drink. He sits beside her and asks 'why the long face?' 'My mother was raped by a horse.'

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its was amazinglysmooth fuck off

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Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

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What do potatoes wear to bed? Potatoes don't sleep and don't wear clothes.

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Women can vote? wtf

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the anti-joke.com joke was just like a normal joke. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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Two muffins are in an oven, and one muffin says to the other "It sure is getting hot in here". the other muffin says "holy crap, a talking muffin."

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why did the chicken cross the bread? because chicken salad

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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roses ar red vilots ar blue i have hiv

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If pro- is the opposite of con-, what is the opposite of progress? regress

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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where do cows go on dates? the slaughter house

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Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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