what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

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honest politician

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What did one duck say to the other? Quack.

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Q. What happened when a man went to a bar? A. Nothing, The bar was closed.

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What's worse than a crying baby? A dead one...

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

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what did one tornado say to the other? im dizzy

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber where walking in New York . They both get ice cream... then bieber gets hit by a bus.

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So a moose, a deer, and a horse walk into a bar. One of the people at the bar was a hunter who was carrying his gun. Several people got up and left after they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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What did the black man say when he noticed his crack was missing? I guess they fixed the sidewalk while I was at work.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Ya know what's funny? A joke well-told by a professional comedian.

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how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

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What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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