mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

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your fat

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Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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a man walks into a bar... it was a crow-bar

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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An indian boy gets a girlfriend

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

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what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

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A woman was struck and killed by a truck as she crossed the road. Who's fault is it? The woman's, if she hadn't left the kitchen, she would still be making me sandwitches...

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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Baseball

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Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops