why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? i don't know, he hasn't unwrapped it yet

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Yo mamma so fat, she's on a diet and is losing weight at a good, steady rate.

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I once heard what I consider the best joke ever: But I am not telling it to you, because this is a the anti-joke section. Moral: You better find the secret "real jokes section" because its there, yeeeeeess yeeeeeeeeees of coursehahahahaha!

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What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

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how many babies does it take to fill up a blender? None. they all died before being put in a blender.

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What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

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Why did the football coach go to the bank? To make a deposit

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Why did the boys shout ZACHATTACK? Because zach was attacking

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What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

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What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

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Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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Yes, it's for the patiënt in the other room.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Holocaust? Oh, wait, I said it wrong...

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Molest them

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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