Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? I threw a ball at her.

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knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a blue whale? A: About 10 pounds.

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, technically speaking, chickens lack the capability to cross said road because chances are that it was a highway because highways cover 64% of america's roads. This being said, the possibility of a chicken being able to cross is is highly improbable. So to answer the question.... BACON!!!

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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Penis

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Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

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roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

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How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops