Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

there's 4 men, a rabbi, a priest, a monk, and a captain. they all go on the captain's ship for a cruise with a couple hundred people. this was during the cold war, and the ship was mistaken for a war ship, and the russians missled it. the monk says: "we have to get everyone off the ship!" the rabbit say: "NO! the women and children need to get off first! And we should also hail to Satan!" the Captain says: "OMG! It's a talking Rabbit!" the priest then stops the rabbit to death!" the rabbi says: "The rabbit is right! But just the children!" The Captain says: "Screw the children! this ship is going to Hell, we have talking animals saying we should worship the devil!" the priest says: "Do you think we have time" the monk, the rabbi, and the captain stare and beat him to death.... "Well, he was already going to Hell" the Monk says. But during this entire time the ship has been sinking and another missle blows up the ship. Everyone dies, except for Sean Conery...and Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How did the jew win a marathon? Through hard vigorous training by running everyday and eating healthy.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happens in the end of the original "Pinocchio" Italian fairy tale? He is hanged.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

YOU

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

So this blonde walks into a library.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Why did the baby die? Cuz the father had a small dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops