Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Women have the right to vote.

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What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

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How do you talk to a mentally challenged person? You use words in a sequential order that would make sense grammatically

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What's black and white and black and white and black and white? A chessboard.

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Q: Why don't Jewish cannibals like Germans A: Because it gives them gas

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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Why do people read Bibles? To learn about God.

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Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with a pool table? I don't know.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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Whats Black and White all Over? Ask Your Mother

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Why did the black guy hit his head while walking through a doorway? Because he was tall.

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A rapist is asked to teach a kindergarden class. The kids learn many things and have a great day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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