Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

what did one tornado say to the other? im dizzy

You had better thumbs up this post.

What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

Why did the chicken cross the road? This website is terrible. Are you servers from 1990? I hope you all get cancer.

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

Gay jokes arn't funny. "Come" on guys.

i eat poop

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

A clown walking down the steet, trips -Ryan Vallee

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Stephen Walking hawks into a bar.

Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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