Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

david give me my money back... i will have it next week

So I was making this bagel right?And my dad walks in while I'm making this bagel(cause we're in a rush you know?) and he's yells"HURRY UP!!!!"I'm like man.... I sure do got alot of YELL in my bagel .

Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

What do you call a deaf-black man that professionally generates maps of the world? A cartographer.

I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

Why doesn't Batman exist? Because he was made up.

A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

What happened to the twins? 9/11

Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

why did the little boy cross the road? because he had been raped.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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