Roses are red. I f***** a dude. you're a failed abortion. I never loved you.

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A muslim walks through a medal detector before the entrance of the airport terminal. The alarm goes off and he is arrested by TSA officials, they open his jacket and find 30lbs of high explosives.

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Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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What did james say on his bitrhday? There was no birthday because he was aborted but he said ''crunch'' anyway

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What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

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What do you call a barrel full of monkeys? A game, you idiot.

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Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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Pete and Repeat are sitting on a bridge, Pete fell off and Repeat still hasn't been able to forgive himself for pressuring Pete to join him on such a perilous perch.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

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why was the girl sleeping on the ground? because she was dead

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

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Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

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Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

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shut up kobe!

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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