Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did winnie the pooh have his head in the toilet,? it was clogged.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get a black man out of his house? you ring the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down -41

women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ben Affleck

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Geography Teacher: Bill, British Columbia agreed to join confederation when the government of Canada agreed to do what? Bill: To build a bridge to where my father is who is divorced with my mom.*tear* Geography Teacher: Is that really nesscary Bill? You have a detention.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the big pickle say to the little pickle? "I'm black."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops