Knock, Knock! Go away!

What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

Child: Hey mom can i go to the store with you? Mom: no son, i'm not really going to the store. I'm cheating on your father.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

fack me in the ace! CC

how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

What's the difference between 6th graders and Jews? 6th graders make it back from camp. :)

WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

Video Games

My friend billy had a ten foot.... Garden hose. Upon showing it to the neighbour next door he hit it with a rake which significantly shortened it and subsequently had to buy another

what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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