Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane from Mexico City to Los Angeles? A pilot you racist.

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How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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What do you do when you do what the do is the do for the do to do what you're doing that's done for what she did if you didn't do what not to do? ^error

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Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

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So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

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What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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WHY DO JEWS HATE GERMANY? THEY DON'T THEY FORGAVE THE NAZIS :-) ( . )( . ) -------

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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