What do you call a man without any money? Broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

thumb_up thumb_down +19

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man goes to the till of a 7-11 to buy a 12-pack of condoms. "Busy night?" asks the cashier boldly. The man complains to the store's manager about the cashier's misconduct and she is given a formal warning.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Were did the balls go? A: In the sack.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What happened when the Texan saw snow for the first time? He said "Oh my goodness this is cool"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's funny about 3 black men in a car going off a cliff? Nothing. They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

poop nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down +53

a man walked into a bar and said ow

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

heyy emit chase wazzup

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There once was a man who had a penis that was so big, his girlfriend liked it a lot. A year later they got married and had kids, but then the man lost his accounting job and things went downhill.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, violets are black, you better watch your anus, cause jimmy is back!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Math Quiz! If sally was born on September 18th, 1997, how old will she be on her birthday? Leave your answers on her grave tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops