I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know most poems rhyme, This one doesn't

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

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Ask me if i'm a tree... "Are you a tree?".... No

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

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Two guys went into a bar and started drinking. After sometime one guy said to the other, "I love your mother.I want to marry her." The other guy said,"Come on dad,you have been drinking too much."

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I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

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2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

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Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

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yo mamas so fat that when she wears a bathing suit people go "wow, that women is fat"

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Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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What did the asian do with his homework? finish it. as is expected from children his age.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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