Ham sandwich

Why did the man take off his pants A: because they were uncomfortable to sit in

there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

Mum, "Why aren't you listening to me, are you deaf or something?" Son, (Silence)...

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

vote this down and i will DOX you

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

Get on the boat.

What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

It’s dead.

How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

Uh Oh you just fell, So, So I've got one thing to say to you, And what's that Don't fall it gets you down!!!!!!!!

FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

I'm hungry.

what do i refer too White people = Business Yellow People = Smart Black People = Drug Smugglers, Terrorists, Rapists etc

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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