How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

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A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he dropped his phone fell in.

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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Knock Knock Dude there is no door

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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