roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

My real life is like my iPad I don't have an iPad.

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Paris. Paris who? Paris, France.

Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

Hi is the longest two letter word in the world

Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

"Knock knock" "The doors open" "Oh, okay"

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

What were the murderer's last words before he was put to death by electric chair? "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNFHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................................................................................................................." He then defecated in his pants.

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

Why did Timmy drop his ball? Because he was hit by a bus. A) Knock knock? B) Who's there? C) Not Timmy

Whats green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? A girl scout that got hit by a car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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