A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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why did the kid drop his sandwich? his hand was cut off

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Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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What did the rock say to the other rock? It didnt

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

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Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

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What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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a jewish man with a boner walks into a wall what does he hit first his cheek due to the fact he was looking at an attractive woman

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

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If I became the president of the U.S.A I would change our national animal from eagle to smeagle. Like this if you agree. By Adam Chebali

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Q: What did the Kool-Aid Man say when he crashed through a wall? A: "OW! That hurt!"

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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