Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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What did the Asian get on his math assignment? 56%, he forgot about it and passed it in a day late with a number of questions uncompleted.

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Why was timmy no longer being bullied at school? The rope said it all! Bitch Died HA

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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what do poor black guy and poor white guy have in common..................................................... their poor

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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I'm sn otter

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Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Three men walked into a metal pole

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?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

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One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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Why was the black man scared of the chainsaw? Because his father was killed by one when he landed on it when he fell of his ladder that was holding him up while he was cutting the limbs of a tree.

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what is racecar backwards in reverse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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