why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

What's dead? Your mum.

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

Why did the crab blush? It didn't because crab's can't blush.

A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

Q. Why did the boy get so fat? A. From playing Pokemon Pearl Edition

Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

Roses are red Violets are blue Polytetrafluoroethylene is a synthetic fluoropolymer of tetrafluoroethylene that has numerous applications

What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

VaginaBoob ^.^

Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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