A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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It got hit by a rocket.

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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You have a birthday party and invite 5 celebrities: Britney spears, Lady Gaga, Hulk Hogan, Barack Obama, and Oprah. Meanwhile, there is a cow in a nearby pasture pooping.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suisidal

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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XD A COZY FIGHT XD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? I am gonna kick your ass, break your face and then give you a kiss on the cheek as your mangled corpse bleeds out... XD :)) THANKS FOR THE LAUGHTER XD XD Reminds me of a former comment where you describe the local weather, you know, we do not live that far away from each other, hell it was actually the time, we are completely in the same timezone, so anyway, do you also get cartoon network on your television?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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Where was Susy after the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

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why was the cow laying down? because little johnny shot him with a 50 calliber

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

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What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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