Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's black and hangs from trees? Tire swings

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Kindness is like peeing in your pants, Everyone can see the results, but only You can feel the warmth

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get away from a gigantic tiger slowly stalking him

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Your mom is so old she died

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is Stephen Hawking's condom brand called? Anti-Virus

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A priest, rabbi, and a monk are sitting on a plane. One is in first class, one is in business class, and one is in coach. It turns out they're all going to the same interfaith conference.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the old man say? Im old

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Where can you find the best black man soup? I don't know. Cannibilism is no longer socially acceptable.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A guy walks into a bar and says 'Ow!'

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's a word that describes someone annoying, black, starts with an N and ends with a R? Nagger

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops