Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Why didn't Helen Keller drive? With all that time she spent learning how to read and write despite being blind and deaf, authoring numerous books, and being a prolific political activist; she simply did not have the substantial time to acquire a driver's license.

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What happened to your hamster? It died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

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A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

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The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

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A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

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What does a camel wear at war? Camelflage

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A man was caught cross dressing by his wife. She divorced him.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? no... Well, It's really nice. :)

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Your mom is such a slut that your dad didn't even ask her if you were his biological child and raised you as if you were, regardless of what the dna results may suggest.

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What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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What's worse than waking up with a hangover? Not waking up at all

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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why did the boy stay home from school? it was saturday

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A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

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Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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