roses are black violets are gray im color blind

how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Knock knock! Who's there? The doorbell wasn't working.

The chickens have become self-aware!

So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

Does pizza sound good for dinner?

My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

How did the boy compliment the girl? He told her she had a lot of breasts. In return, she told him he had many penises.

What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

This joke is funny

WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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