What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

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Man: Want to hear an anti joke? Woman: ok Man: Why did the the girl fall off her bike? Woman: I don't know. Man: She got hit by a refrigerator. Woman: ok

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

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A depressed horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "Millions of years of natural selection." The horse then tries to drink away his sorrows, but the alcohol is only a temporary release from the pain he's feeling. He kills himself the next day.

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A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the shed I'm gonna screw you

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

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Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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ok, a family walks into a talant agency, the talent agent says "What can you do". The family breaks out into a sing and dance routine, and do nothing sexual in their routine.

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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A Jewish man, black guy, and asian all walk into a bar. Can you guess which one got arrested? That's right, the criminal

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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