A woman who owns a parrot leaves her home, forgetting that a plumber is scheduled to come fix her sink. A few minutes after she leaves, the plumber arrives and knocks on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waits for a minute and, seeing that nobody has come to the door, knocks again. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, a little more loudly, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink!" The plumber waits for a minute and bangs hard on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screams, "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIINK!!!" Just then, the plumber clutches his chest and falls dead to the ground. When the woman returns home, she sees the dead man in front of her door. She opens her door to go to her phone and asks the parrot, "who is it?" The parrot replies, "WHO IS IT?"

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

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Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

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"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

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What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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Wendy went for a walk every day in the forest. Why not today? She was shot yesterday

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What did the man say to his wife. Hi

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What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

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A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

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What did the elephant say to the clown? Swell, morning isn't it?

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Moral: Sure, your number is the one that ends with 853 right? Do not reply if I am right. Moral2: BECAUSE TOP COMMENT... AND SERIOUSLY, THAT NUMBER BETTER END WITH 69 AFTER I CALL YOU! DO NOT REPLY

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rarw

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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Your mom's house is so old, that she has rats and other various critters such as spiders, gnats, and mosquitoes.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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