What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

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Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not the parents

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What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

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what is big and white? Your Mom

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How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

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Dick spice

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

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Your all fags

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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What do you call a blonde who likes to read? A bookworm.

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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Why is the fat kid on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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Shaun Sutton Call me: 1-800-tryhard ;)

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Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

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What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

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This joke is funny

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What kind of bread makes pickles? Dill Dough

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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