Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Call jets pizza at 8637090999 and say porr cisero is still stuck and shit will go down

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the guy say before he learned how to Dougie? Teach me how to Dougie

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did Matt stop the robbers? He called the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walked into a bar. He broke his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Do you know the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human, and one is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

*spongebob voice* 25

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops