Your mom's so fat... she probably needs to go on some sort of diet to avoid a serious heart condition and inevetible death

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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Name an American born white man in the NBA. Thats right, you cant

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

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God

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How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family cried about his final days of his life.

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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Obama lin Baden.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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What's worse than cancer? Death.

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Jellybeans

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2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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Why did the cupcake walk into the bar? It can't it's a cupcake

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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