Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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Why did the cupcake walk into the bar? It can't it's a cupcake

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

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so if you need 20 dollars and you just kicked your cat how old is your mom. cake because you are a 666 member.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

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What is the difference between green and desert sage? About 20 bucks a gallon.

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Q. What does physiks sound to most of the people? A. There were two camels, one was green, how much does the sand weight when its dark?

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

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how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

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Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

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What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

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wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

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What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

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How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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