In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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What did the Black construction worker say to the Asian salesman? I want some milk.

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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How do you call a black man selling fruits ? Yes, but I'm not sure

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

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What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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Why is it bad to smoke in a public place? Because secondhand smoke may cause lung cancer.

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It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

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A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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