Roses are red, Violets are blue this poem sucks, GET OVER IT -brett

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What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

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What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A buissnes man walks into a meeting and says hello i'm a buissnesman

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly my dick down your throat.

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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What do you call a Mexican who likes to eat burritos? A Mexican

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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