What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

Chuck Norris doesnt need air to live, Air needs chuck Norris to live. Actaully that statment is a fallacy because it would be fatal to not breathe

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok.

How much seamen does a gay guy have??? A whole butt load.

A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5... that's $10.

Knock Knock. "Who's there?" The cops.

Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

How do you kill a blonde? You wait until she dies of old age, then copyright her death.

The meme walks out of the bar.

What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

Q: What is the difference between a horny college girls and a horny high school girl? A: Usually, an age will seperate people in different grades. Also, what grade their in.

Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

what do you call a black man in prison? justice.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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