why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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hi

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

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Transgenders! More than meets the eye! Transgenders! Girl was once a guy! LGBTs wage the battle to destroy The homophobic forces of Christianity! Transgenders! Homos in disguise!

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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Q. What's better then a baby in a microwave? A. What the hell is wrong with you? Did your parents not love you enough when you were born? Everything is worse then a baby in a microwave! Besides the felony charges it is extremely wrong! Your going to hell.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob. What do you call a man with no arms or legs in front of your door? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms or legs hanging on your wall? Art.

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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You ever notice when geese fly in a V there is one line that is always longer than the other? Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese in that line.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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Elizabeth Warren

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If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

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- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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