when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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There was this fruit joke, but it had no punchline.

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

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Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The fact that you actually took time to read this cynically hypnotizing answer that you cannot seem to stop reading even though you know that this sentence is just a clever run to show the epitomy of the anti joke. ha-ha.

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Why did the white man cry? Because his mistress, Shanghai, was threatening to tell his wife that they were in a relationship and, out of anger, he bashed Shanghai's head in and she is dead,

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Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

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What is large white and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A refridgerator

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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What was Mozart's favorite vegetable? Aspara-gus.

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What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

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Hello penis

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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