Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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why did the man die? because he died.

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A baby seal walks into a club

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Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set in her backyard? Neither did she.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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In soviet russia, roses are violet

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What happens to a black man when he jumps into a pool of clorox? He turns white!

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What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

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have safe sex

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

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when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

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Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

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Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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What did death say to life? Go die

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How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

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David Cameron

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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