So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

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Where do you find a ocean with no water. on a map. thumbs up for great jokes. please

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an apple? I don't cum on an apple before I eat it.

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

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who farted your mother

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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What is the difference?

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yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

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What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

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Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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The outside of my house is painted yellow.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

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Q: What's the difference between lucky charms and a baby? A: One is magically delicious and the other is a breakfast serial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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