Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

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What happens when a Republican accidentally walks into a Gay/Straight Alliance meeting? The man asks if he is in the right place. He apologizes and then leaves.

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Reading the same holocaust anti-jokes for the third time. Well the holocaust is worse, but that's not the point.

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What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

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why did suzy fall off the swing? she has no arms, knock knock who's there? Not suzy!

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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Remember those days where we planned what to do with our lives instead of wondering what things lied ahead? Those where the days, it does not matter if we are relics, heroes, or villains today. Back then, we did not seek to discover our future, we sought to create it, back then our people did not pray for a better day, but worked for it. And love and kindness was not something only found in heaven, but what we shared in what was the closest thing, to heaven on earth. Tell me the truth, are there many like us left in this world?

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Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

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Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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I have no joke. u mad?

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Where was little Sara when the bomb went off? Everywhere. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" Sara's hands

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WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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