Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

Hitler walks up to a little girl at a concentration camp: - How old are you? - I'm turning 7 tomorrow! - Nope.

How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

j.p. is dumb

Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

LOL we are spamming this site too much!

you are driving down the highway, if two birds make a bee then how many pies can fly at once? None because I can't read

Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

Q: What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head? A: HORSE DICK

What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...