A Great White Shark eats a baby seal's mother. Great White Sharks don't feel remorse.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Janie miss school today? Because she fell in a well.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the white guy sit on the toilet? So he could take a poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

thumb_up thumb_down +2

*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did joe drown ? he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops